Christmas morning...
The cold gray San Joaquin Valley fog seemed to close in around me as I drove. The morning had already been filled with experiences and circumstances that left me feeling as cold and gray on the inside as the fog appeared on the outside. My thoughts replayed the phone conversations, the people I loved and cared about, the hurts and struggles.
Read More
Glorious sunlight rose over the mountains, illuminating thunderous waterfalls lining Yosemite Valley. Early in the morning, before the crowds arrived, I sat in the meadow. My ears soaked in the sounds of birdsong. My eyes witnessed gravity pulling water down granite walls. My awe-struck soul marveled at God’s creativity and sustaining power.
It had been a week. My dad passed away and four days later my dear friend, Jan, also passed. Grief paralyzed me. I needed to get out. I mean, I needed to get outside. Hence, the trip to Yosemite.
As God sustains the mighty waterflow, he is sustaining us, even when we feel crushed under the weight of schedules, responsibilities, and grief. Life feels foggy sometimes. We feel overwhelmed and under-qualified to lead lives worth of the call of Christ. During those days, where do we turn? Where does our help come from? Who can we trust?
Read More
Yesterday I unexpectedly found myself by a lone bench on an empty oceanfront. A boat was just off the shore, solitary but securely anchored in the sea. I ached with the unexpected beauty, the symbolic solitude of the boat. I felt like this boat. Alone, aching, but securely anchored. As I stood there, I thought about the last two months and how a crisis can set off a whole new cycle of grief and loss.
Read More