Are We Still In This Together?

In March when Californians were given the stay-at-home order, life as I knew it came to an abrupt halt. And now, almost a year later, life still hasn’t returned to normal. Some days I find myself appreciating the quieter pace and being able to go for bike rides, and other days I’m over it, ready to be done.

As I talk with friends, they’re going through the same ups and downs. For some, the downs seem to be deeper and last longer, for others the anxiety is almost overwhelming. I’m hearing more news of friends who know people who have committed suicide. Almost everyone talks about how hard the isolation is on their children and they struggle trying to manage work and home and keeping their kids on track with school. Of course, we feel out of sorts and grieve; there are so many losses, some obvious, some more ambiguous and intangible. Just when I think it can’t get any worse, it does. And the next month I think, it can’t get worse than this, and it does again. This is a sad time and it’s hard.

At the outset, it seemed so clear: we are in this together. But now, I’m not so sure.

I’m meeting with pastors’ wives who are weary, exhausted from listening to people who are upset and angry and say negative things. There have always been some in the church who felt comfortable voicing their entitlements, but now they’re louder, more strident, refusing to “agree to disagree” and move on. We are wearing each other out.

I would love for each of us, in our families and churches and online, to be showing empathy and compassion, coming alongside each other, not letting our frustrations tear each other down. The Apostle Paul after responding directly to his critics poses a question: “Why did Christ set us free?”

Christ didn’t set us free so that we can go back to our old ways, demanding our rights, tearing each other down. Our Christian liberty, Paul says, is given to us so that we are free to serve one another in love.

“Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.” (Gal 6:9-10)

We are all becoming weary, but we can’t give up now. We have to do good and keep doing good. Perhaps this week God will give you the opportunity to be his arms of love for someone who needs to be encouraged. Let’s be the ones in our families who are known for being kind, patient, peaceful (Gal. 5). We’ll never go wrong giving up our preferences, listening with compassion, understanding another perspective, surrendering our outrage to Jesus, seeking a way to ease someone’s burden, loving as we’d like to be loved. Let’s use our freedom to do good, to serve one another, and to show love, especially to those who belong to the family of God.

And if you are growing weary, please email me: LuannBudd@newim.org. We’ll find some time to talk.